Boy was I glad to have off Sunday. I talked in my previous post how the Boston Bombings had really triggered my PTSD. Well, I did what I said I was going to do and I turned off the news.
Too bad it made absolutely no difference whatsoever. Every day I went to work, people wouldn't stop talking about the latest developments in the bombings. Yippee. Everyone knows I am a veteran and this situation was the first time I wished people didn't know. Everyone wanted my opinion on the situation. Everyone wanted to tell me about it and hear what I thought. People kept on telling me they were afraid it wasn't over - that something was going to happen again, and soon. Not exactly the type of thing I needed to hear. So, work became trigger after trigger. The only thing that's kept me from hiding in my hole is my love for my family and my advocacy work. The gym has TVs suspended in front of every piece of cardio equipment. Any guesses as to what was on every one of those TVs? I couldn't escape it until Sunday, my day off. I took a break from things all morning and early afternoon and just spent time with my wife and daughter. We met my sister-in-law and her two Blue Tick Coon Hounds and we went for a walk in the local park. It was really nice just to get away and enjoy a cool spring day. I felt revitalized and came home and got to work on website design for the non-profit. So what happens now? I need to rethink my strategy for coping with this and not getting triggered at work. I can't keep this up or I am going to exhaust myself. I guess I can talk about it in group therapy this week and see what we come up with.
Adam Read
4/23/2013 01:14:24 pm
Hey man, 4/23/2013 01:56:10 pm
Adam,
Dennis
4/23/2013 09:03:30 pm
Your brain can actually turn off your PTSD like a switch on a light? Years later man, I can't. 4/23/2013 09:44:19 pm
Turn it off like a light? Hell no. Getting time away from triggers so that I can re-energize myself and better cope? Yup. It's taken a lot of work and a lot of looking at myself, not liking what I saw, and doing something to change it. My group therapy is with people I trust and folks dedicated to learning skills to better manage their PTSD. That's what we hope for. Being able to better manage our PTSD so we can have lives and be worthy of the love that has found us in life. I am sorry that you have not found help that works for you. It took me nine years of searching to find what worked for me, but I never stopped looking and trying to be a better man. I hope that you find what you need to better cope. Have you looked into The Soldiers Project? I receive individual counseling from one of their trained volunteers.
Maria
4/24/2013 03:13:55 am
Adam, I read this and I thought... I know where those people who were asking you were coming from. They wanted to show you respect and make you feel like a valuable contributor. Wow, look at the difference between what they thought and what you were feeling! This is a great way to get into a conversation about what people can do to better understand how to handle a situation that involves someone with PTSD. I am not a combat vet, but I have had and am recovering from PTSD from a trauma from years ago. That experience, unfortunately has given me no idea how to handle my interactions with combat vets with PTSD. Rather than trying to bring out the triggers, is avoidance the best strategy? How did you wish people would act? I'm sorry to be pressing you with more questions, but it is so important to me to learn how to deal with this as my future as a registered dietician is going to be working with combat veterans (fingers and toes crossed that's how it works out) and I would love to know what the best approach to this type of situation is. Adam, if you could have had a magic wand and made people handle it in a way that was helpful to you... what would they do?
Maria beat me to the question. I can feel empathy and want things to be better for you. But that's not enough. 4/24/2013 01:27:31 pm
My mother said something tonight that I thought was very astute. Talking about what happened is how the rest of the world works through tragedies like what happened in Boston. It made me realize that I just need to communicate to people that I would prefer that they don't talk about it with me around. It's the best way to avoid the triggers and pointless confrontation.
Max Harris
4/27/2013 03:01:26 pm
And I'm grateful for a responsive audience. ;)
Adam J. Read
4/30/2013 03:11:00 pm
I guess I have my answer then. Good luck to you, Max. I hope you find the audience you're looking for. Comments are closed.
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Max HarrisAs I continue my life with PTSD, I will share my challenges and discoveries on this blog. Archives
October 2018
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