I had a wonderful day today. I got up feeling rested, I spent a lot of time laughing with my daughter and I welcomed two new moderators to my Facebook Forum. Everything was going great until I went to pour some coffee late in the day and I spilled it on my right hand, scalding the crap out of it. It is really red and painful right now. The physical pain was soon joined by emotional as I flashed back to Iraq when my hand was also really red for different reasons. I could even smell the blood in the air. My wife could tell something was wrong and she asked me if I was ok. I told her that the last time I remember my hand being this red was when I was in Iraq. She instantly responded with, "No it's not. The last time your hand was that red is when you handed our daughter to me." I had mentioned before that the blood associated with my daughter's birth had helped by giving me a positive association for blood. And I was right. Thinking of Caley's birth started calming me down a little bit. The flashback became an intrusive recollection, which I find much easier to contend with. Yet another reason why support is so important - where would I have spiraled to if my wife wouldn't have been there to snap me out of it?
As I continue my life with PTSD, I will share my challenges and discoveries on this blog.