It's amazing how being laid up for a week can adversely affect your outlook. Even though I am feeling physically better, I am feeling progressively more depressed and that concerns me greatly. People who are ill for prolonged periods are prone to mild depression. When you add PTSD into the equation, thinks spiral down a whole lot faster and a whole lot farther.
What's frustrating as hell is that I KNOW this and I can't seem to snap out of it. I am doing everything I can to stay focused on doing things that are productive and fulfilling for me and it seems to be helping a little bit. While I know I focused a lot on the things I am dissatisfied with over the past few days, I haven't come up with any good plans to address those issues. I am going to read over everything I wrote in my last blog with my wife and see what we can come up with. Sometimes I get my thoughts out on here and forget that I haven't shared them with my wife.
All I know is that my wife's love and support mean everything to me and help me regain proper perspective when I get in these funks. Maybe, if I remembered to share with her all that I blogged about she would be better equipped to deal with me.
Yep, still in a funk. At least I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. My ear is finally healing better and as soon as I am allowed to go back to work, I think that the majority of my depression will lift. If it doesn't lift, on to plan B. When I figure out what plan B is, I'll let you know.
As I continue my life with PTSD, I will share my challenges and discoveries on this blog.