OK, when I said I was committed to doing everything in my power to learn to cope with my PTSD, I did mean everything. I went to the OIF/OEF support group last night at the VA Outpatient Clinic near my house. It was me, the Doc, and one other vet. None of the other regular guys showed up. Curious, the other vet asked me about myself and I told him the basics. He asked me why I hadn't come to group before if I had been home for so long. I told him the honest truth: "Because last time I came, everyone pulled out their dicks and compared trauma. I don't care to compete and I don't want to corner the market on suffering."
The other vet laughed. He said most of those guys know they aren't welcome. He said the group is a bunch of serious guys that want to make lives for themselves. You have no idea how happy I was to hear that. I had been looking for people like me to connect with in the flesh. I needed the real life contact with others and I got it. I didn't realize how much I missed the connection with other vets until I went yesterday. I look at all that I have accomplished and all that I need to learn and I don't feel so overwhelmed, knowing that there are other guys, in my area, that are struggling with the same hurdles I am. So here's my message: Even if you aren't ready to share, go to group meetings if you have them in your area. Just listening to what other vets have to say and how they react in situations similar to yours can be very educational and provide you with a very important connection other vets. You may not feel like you want the connection, but I would wager you need it. Loneliness and isolation is what really sends us down the rabbit hole, so hold on tight and trust yourself enough to make new friends - friends who know EXACTLY what you are going through.
3 Comments
JoDell Christensen
3/26/2012 10:55:26 pm
wow powerful story so glad you took the first step.. God Bless
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3/26/2012 11:07:27 pm
Thanks, JoDell. Let's hope the message gets out there for others and they make the connections they need.
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Jill
3/27/2012 09:57:10 am
Thank you for sharing this Max, I hope it inspires other vets to reach out and join support groups at their local VA's. I agree that being with others who have experienced similar circumstances and traumas that we have creates a kind of "home" feeling or bond that can bring wonderful healing! So happy for you that you reached out and found support :), continued healing!
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Max HarrisAs I continue my life with PTSD, I will share my challenges and discoveries on this blog. Archives
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