OK. I have been almost a week back at it. Work has been going well and so has home life. I won't lie and say that it is easy. I am struggling still with motivation to do the little things. The difference this time around is that I am not letting myself sit and do nothing. If I am tired, I don't sit and veg in front of the TV until after Caley is asleep and until I have done all I can to help my wife around the house. I think, honestly, that it is the harder part. Work, by nature, tires me out. I am surrounded by people I don't know all day long and it pushes and prods at me, making me anxious. I do my best to do my job and not let the little things bother me.
I will say that being able to get a good night's sleep helps me get through the day. Having my medications stabilized seems to have really paid dividends as well. My overall physical health is probably better than it has been in ages. I just need to shed the weight I gained in the interim.
My biggest fear, still, is that I will end up being in absentia when I get home from work and that I will head back down the path I took a year ago. I think that I am doing all of the right things to ensure I stay focused on what matters. The other thing that still remains important to me is my blogging and my advocacy efforts. I make sure that I take a little time out of every day for myself. We'll see how things continue to go in the coming days and weeks.
I will say that being able to get a good night's sleep helps me get through the day. Having my medications stabilized seems to have really paid dividends as well. My overall physical health is probably better than it has been in ages. I just need to shed the weight I gained in the interim.
My biggest fear, still, is that I will end up being in absentia when I get home from work and that I will head back down the path I took a year ago. I think that I am doing all of the right things to ensure I stay focused on what matters. The other thing that still remains important to me is my blogging and my advocacy efforts. I make sure that I take a little time out of every day for myself. We'll see how things continue to go in the coming days and weeks.
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